Why good barristers are poor listeners

Barristers are paid to give advice so it’s tempting to hit the transmit button in order to discharge this duty.  It’s not always what clients want.

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”  Steven R. Covey (attributed)

The gift of listening

A few years ago I worked with someone who had been trained how to listen. His skills as a listener were so developed that a conversation with him felt like a gift.   

What I learnt shapes the conversations I have with barristers about how to listen to their clients so their clients want to listen to them.

Your training doesn’t help you

In a study cited in the Harvard Business Review* poor listeners were identified as those who listen only to identify errors in reasoning or logic. 

Ergo, good barristers are poor listeners.

It’s a problem, because getting to the right answer is only one part of the job. Demonstrating to a client that you’ve grounded your argument in their reality is what counts for them.

What happened was…

In your cons this week, count the number of times you hear this:

“What happened was…”

Most clients will feel compelled to give you their version of events.  If you allow them to exhaust themselves with their story, you are likely to meet a more co-operative client than if you steamroller them into listening to what you have to say.

If the case goes against them but they feel they’ve been heard by you, there will be one less person to blame for the outcome.

Practice patience before giving your advice

In an earlier post, I recommended getting to the point in a con.

You do need to arrive at a con prepared with an answer but approach the conversation prepared to listen to other points of view.

“I have a proposal, but I’d like to hear from you first in case there are factors of which I’m not aware which could influence our approach” is an opening you could try.

Good listening isn’t just nodding in silence

The study referenced in the HBR article generated four key findings:

1. Good listening is much more than being silent while the other person talks.
2. Good listening included interactions that build a person’s self-esteem
3. Good listening was seen as a cooperative conversation
4. Good listeners tended to make suggestions.

If you can demonstrate that you’ve listened you will reduce the challenges of having to manage a frustrated or uncooperative client later.

HBR: What great listeners actually do

Skills to help you connect with clients can be learned.

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